Let’s get personal, navigating emotions and struggles.
August 17, 2017
One part of me is happy that my kiddo is going back to school next week, another part of me is ready to work even more, another part of me will miss her running errands with me and another part of me will miss watching funny movies during the day while Florida heat makes it uncomfortable to go out. I have been an entrepreneur mom for my daughter’s whole life and haven’t worked for anyone for the past 9 years. I started as a master colorist freelancer at a great, beautiful salon in St. James, NY with Rolando Cevallos while I was building my beauty concierge business throughout Long Island. I moved to Florida to be closer to my family and I have to admit, being new in town starting from scratch on my new business which developed into my life purpose while attending massage school and providing fully for my girl… all I could think of was “making things happen” for us. I wish I could have spent more quality time with my family and less time trying to “make things happen” for my business. There were many times I was giving up and hiding inside my sheets, crying, afraid to fail her and with no energy to do anything. I learned to give myself and all aspects of me permission to feel the emotions and honor them… setting a timer to keep focus and listen to the message my emotions wanted to give to me. In those darker times, especially when my divorce was keeping me hostage from claiming what I truly desired for my life and my daughter’s, I gave in quickly to many demands, thinking it would be the end of the difficulty and drama, but it was not. Creating a divorce agreement from a confused and defeated feeling was not a plan my higher self had for me. For the past year I have been working closely with my lawyer and governmental institutions to demand safety, stability and security for me and my daughter. Long story short ~ I have been learning to awaken the part of me who is fearless to claim what is in alignment with my life and my daughter’s journey to transcend her emotional traumas at a young age. Even in those dark times ~ I found the tiniest grain of hope and trust that everything would pass and everything was perfect ~ as it needed to be ~ for me to awaken into who I am meant to be. I have compared myself multiple times to other successful influencers like me. Comparing myself to others made me feel worse. I have come to be at peace that I am where I am, and where I need to be. What I have to offer to this world doesn’t come from all the thousands of hours of studies, seminars and programs I have invested in; what I have to offer comes from my own life experience. Who am I? I am a mom, in a relationship with an amazing lover, who is learning to create a conscious co-parenting relationship. I am a woman who has been discovering and healing traumas of abuse from this life and past generations. I am a woman who is an open-hearted entrepreneur and knows how a divorce can affect your productivity in your business and finances. I am a woman who has had $6 in her bank account when her office rent was due. After all that, and finding the wisdom and peace to make things happen, I am at peace, telling myself: “everything has been a part of my growth and evolution, and I am aware of when to let go of the addiction to suffering.” My girl is going to school next week ~ I am committing myself to play big this fall season. No excuses to be lazy for no reason. I am giving myself 4 years (when I turn 40 years old) to be a traveling entrepreneur while my daughter and lover travel with me too. Why am I sharing this with you? Because no matter what is happening in your life right now, it is making you THE MASTER YOU ARE! Love you, Lucia Gabriela
