When we find ourselves in difficult situations where the other person or ourself is blocked on receiving or welcoming any information, it’s important to pause and breathe. With time and experience I have personally practiced some of the following simple techniques which have built strong communication skills.
Breathe, breathe and more breathing. This practice welcomes oxygen into our body and brain to clear any sticky thoughts, energy or emotions.
Invite ourself to step back and see the situation from different angle and see the other’s point of view or perspective.
Actively listen to other’s point of view and just observe what is actually happening before jumping to conclusions. During conflict, we blind ourselves by acting out too quickly instead of taking the time to process what is happening.
Take responsibility for our actions and doings, and own it. This holds space for others to see us in our vulnerability and integrity, which builds stronger bonds of trust and connection.
Never take things personal. We must stay in a place of self love and realize that everyone is living their own experience and creations, and we are here to witness ourselves and all of us as a collective.
Remembering that others’ actions and doings is about them and not about us. We mirror each other and many times our actions against others is because something within ourself needs to be addressed, healed and embraced.
Remind ourselves of our values, standard and boundaries. This helps us to create safety within self and any conflicts or triggers will be addressed according to what is truly important to us. So it is very important to be very clear with our values because they guide us in how we live our life and create our relationships.
Invite those who we are struggling with to an open-hearted conversation about the topic that needs to be addressed, doing this as an invitation lessens the friction in the response and allows others to feel welcomed, accepted and understood before the meeting itself. Going to others with the assumption to talk whenever is right for us, is not a good indicator we will be open to truly listen to them.
Eye contact and eye connection is beyond powerful.
Start the conversation with “I feel this…” “I think what I hear you saying is…”, instead of pointing fingers and blaming right away or pointing out other’s mistakes.
I love this topic so much and it is one of my favorite topics to teach and coach about.
How do you deal with conflict in your relationship? Share with me!
